Ever noticed how hard it is to actually get started on something? Since the new year, I’ve been trying to put better habits in place in my life. Eating less, eating better, drinking less alcohol, cutting down on wheat, sugar and anything else tasty which can survive without going mouldy for months… I’ve been doing meditation, I’ve been keeping up with my French lessons, AND I went to the gym. I was feeling like a phoenix, rising from the ashes of MacDonald’s wrappers.
However, today I jumped on the scales, only to discover I’ve put on weight following a ‘plant based’ diet. Feeling defeated, I went up the road to the local green grocer, who proceeded to tell me how much he loves the hot dogs, which the take away shop next door sells. So much for the fucking green smoothies. The gym was pretty out-there too. Lots of aggressive women doing squats with weights (Body Pump class). Everywhere I looked, people were doing their exercises badly, to the music, and looking quite surly about it. It made me miss my yoga classes, which I’ll be heading back to next week.
So, after a month of new habits and trying new things, here’s what I think. Getting started is hard, but filled with the promise of change and new horizons. Once you get started, this might not be quite how it works out, and you may need to change course more than once to get where you want to go. I guess the main thing is to keep trying, to leave the stuff behind you which you know doesn’t work, and keep going until you get it right. It’s going to take a while, clearly. Ugh.
It’s like starting to write a new book. For the first day or two, my word count is about 35, and all the household chores I’ve been avoiding get done. Then, one day, if you keep at it, you end up with a 70,000 word novel. There isn’t an easy answer. You just have to start, and keep going.